Next Semester!

I was planning to write a dam long emo post about how depress i was to find out that the only 3 good friends i have in class right now will officially be in another class next semester.
But i had already blogged in my MENTAL BLOG! and it was too long that i couldn't remember the right words that described how i was feeling.

in simple words.
I NEED TO BE INDEPENDENT!
MORE LIKE I NEED TO HAVE FRIENDS IN CLASS THAT I CAN TALK TO!:(

"Did you actually mean what you said?"
"Because of you i am not going, i am staying here!"

i have my reasons why i don't want to go.
well, i actually contemplated going.
but then life is like that.
some reasons many will never understand.

I now have to pretend that i am happy.
I am always Happy:) It's the only way that can keep my life going.Keep me going strong.
I will get use to it i guess...?

In wing's terms...."GET A GRIP. GET OVER IT"

SCREW GROUP WORK NEXT SEMESTER! SCREW ADVERTISING!!!!!!!!

Just slowly...

Slowly every step i take will be a new beginning.
Slowly i will lose you my friend.
Slowly you might come to me and make everything fit.
Slowly my life just feels like a joke.
Slowly they will forget me, their friend.
Slowly i feel you won't mean anything to me.
Slowly the pain will just fade away and everything will feel better.
Slowly i will find that special someone.
Slowly i will build that bridge to the one i love.
Slowly reality will just disappear.
Slowly my life will have meaning.
Again.

My mental blog

FML.

yes! I've contracted conjunctivitis and both my eyes are blood-shot-red!
it's the first time ever i've been absent from school ever since i started poly.
been on MC for 4 days! My right eye is badly swollen and hurts like mad!

I haven't blogged for ages, cos well... i haven't had the time!
last night before i slept. my mind was going wild!
it was like i was blogging in my mind the words flowed out uncontrollably.
if only i could blog in my head. like a mental blog?
i would blog almost everyday.
and my post would actually make sense.
bleak.

school is of course bleak.
it just makes me wonder why i even bothered studying so hard for my Os to get in a bloody course that will eventually kill me after 3 years? considering the fact i have been burning out brain cells and whatever i have left of them and killing myself day by day without proper sleep and without a life!
ok! that's a lie cos technically i do have a life all thanks to my homies.without them i won't survive a day living.
so that's said and done i have died these 4days being at home.without friends.
I can't wait to get back to school, but i'll be wearing my shades for a while more since this sore eyes thingy last for about 2 weeks.

Talking about friends.i will officially have no friends in class next semester. cos my only 3 friends i have in class are all going to bloody Wuhan! i will therefore have no motivation or reason what-so-ever to come to school.the pain of loneliness is already kicking in these past few days.hopefully my class will combine with another class.one that i actually have friends in.people i can actually have a proper conversation with.

It's just well... 3/4 of the people in my semester are highly bleak.and i can't talk to them.
You know there are some people you can talk to and just some people you can't.
So yeah! That's mostly the weird people in my semester. Some i don't even know exist!

Eme wants mentioned that in some way or another how they split the class this semester worked well, cos now we're all friends and we're all close and we're all one gang:)

But now it really sucks! sucks big time!
How to survive? How am i suppose to put on a smile everyday to school without lying to myself that i am...
not happy. not comfortable. not satisfied. not myself:(

I fancy quotes like this...
"Destiny is the bridge we build towards the one we love"